The Dog as a Bereaved Best Friend

Man's Best Friend
A good deal has been written on the subject of the dog as man's best friend, hence it would serve little purpose for me to repeat all that here. For certain people in particular though, a dog might be their only friend. I have come across quite a number of elderly people in my life who, apart from the postman / post-lady, or the odd visitor from Social Services, have no friend relationships beyond their dog or cat. Dogs, due to their devotional nature, particularly feature. But it is not only the elderly. Many people who live in physically isolated areas or who are isolated through their personalities are also dependent upon an animal for friendship. There are even people who are surrounded by others, some who live in families, such as abused children (or abused adults), who are psychologically isolated and who's only friendly relationship is with a dog. And then there are people who are gravely ill. People who's condition slowly and privately degenerates and who depend upon their dog for comfort in their last years or months. I have certainly been to funerals or read accounts of people dying, where it has been said that the person's dog had been their only comfort, their only friend as they neared their end. A dog does not ask difficult questions, nor do they normally get emotional about the person's impending demise. This is all very fortunate for us humans, is it not?

What About The Dog?
I often find myself wondering, when a vicar or a member of the dearly departed person's family is giving an address about that person's final years and mentions how the person's dog had been with them as a steadfast friend to the last, "but what about the dog?"

Is it that people assume the friend relationship is only one way – that a dog can be a friend to a human being but not the other way around? Perhaps they assume that a dog lacks the capacity to have a sense of friendship with a human or even another dog – could that be true? Or is it that perhaps only the dog's owner imagines that the dog sees them as their friend, whereas in others believe the dog is merely behaving in that way in order to be provided with food and comforts?

I do not consider myself particularly sentimental, but it seems to me remarkably selfish of us to see things in this way. If a dog has devoted itself by being a friend to it's owner for a significant period of time and that person then dies, is it not the case that the animal will also feel a sense of loss, even if we don't go as far as to call it grief?

Of course in families when such a death occurs, the animal will usually be taken on by another family member, but I am talking here about people for whom their dog is their only family. Surely it is a subject worthy of consideration, even if we are not pet owner ourselves?

These questions have no definitive answer of course. I merely raise them as a point of social and psychological interest. It seems like the decent thing to do when dogs are unable to speak for themselves.

The story of Nero has a happy ending

Nero
Such a situation, based upon more than one true story, appears in the book "Stories To Tell To Your Dog." Nero, a fairly young Doberman, notices his walks getting shorter and less frequent as his owner declines with a terminal illness. The dog does not understand the reasons and therefore is thinking only of himself (not a crime) when he decides to run away and take his chances in the big wide world. He does not get far before he meets trouble. Luckily a kindly young man helps him and takes him home. The resulting contact with Nero's owner delivers a surprisingly positive outcome.

Stories To Tell Your Dog is available as a paperback from Amazon or CreateSpace, and as an e-book from:

Amazon UK
Amazon.com (or by entering the title and author into your local Amazon website)
Smashwords (all formats)
N.B. You do not need an e-reader. You can download a Kindle App for your computer or download the book from Smashwords as a PDF or plain text file.

Other books by the same author are available on these sites and the bestselling paperback book Long Road Hard Lessons is available from Waterstones Bookshops in the UK.

Oscar – The Qualities Of A Friend

From the age of around 10 to 13yrs I live in Hampshire on a housing estate for military families in a place with the memorable name of Middle Wallop. Although my parents didn't much care for living on a modern housing estate, I was happy there. I loved being able to step outside and knock the doors of friends nearby. I loved being able to wander down to the park, the cinema or up to the NAFFI shop and find plenty of other kids hanging around playing or getting into mischief. And when I think back on those groups of kids, despite having an excellent memory I can hardly put a name or a face to any of them. But there was one character who was nearly always there. Oscar. I will never forget him. He was all the things you could want a friend to be.

Most of all, Oscar was reliable – always available when you were looking for a friend to play with. He was sensible, loyal to us all, highly intelligent, patient, kind, calm, amusing, selfless and undemanding. Most of all he managed to join in the fun but to behave with maturity. Consequently Oscar was popular with everyone and was always included in whatever game or adventure was happening on any given day. Parents did not worry about their children if Oscar was with us.

Now I'm sure most people would agree that there is hardly anyone they knew as a kid who was good to be with ALL of the time. Everyone is annoying, unkind or boring sometimes, no? That is true, but this case is an exception, because Oscar was a dog.

I don't think anyone actually knew who Oscar belonged to. He wore no collar or dog-tag. Mostly a brown Labrador with a slightly pink nose, he was always there or somewhere nearby. Oscar was not like most dogs we knew. He would share our food but he never pestered us. We even believed he was unable to growl or bark until one day he needed to defend us from an aggressive guard dog we encountered when wading across a river.

The estate we lived on was large, nearly a circular mile in diameter, but if Oscar wasn't there you only needed to call his name and he'd be there as quick as a flash. Nobody saw where he had come from or where he went back to at the end of the fun. And no owner ever came looking for him, not even when he accompanied us miles away on long, whole day expeditions. Oscar was a mystery, an enigma, but one we never questioned.

If you like dogs, or your dog likes dog stories, check out   Stories To Tell Your Dog   It is available as a paperback from Amazon or Createspace, and as an e-book from:

Amazon UK
Amazon.com (or by entering the title and author into your local Amazon website)
Smashwords (all formats)
N.B. You do not need an e-reader. You can download a Kindle App for your computer or download the book from Smashwords as a PDF or plain text file.

Other books by the same author are available on these sites and the paperback travel book Long Road Hard Lessons is available from Waterstones Bookshops in the UK.

Book For Dogs Launched

Stories To Tell Your Dog
Tinderbox Publishing in the UK, are pleased to announce the first book published for dogs.
Yes that's right, do not adjust your computer – for dogs!

Research Methods
It was back in 2010 that the author Mark Swain was editing his first book - Long Road Hard Lessons (a non-fiction book about Mark and his son's 10,000 mile cycle expedition from Ireland to Japan). Like many writers, Mark finds it more effective to edit a book by reading it aloud. Having waiting for a moment when he was alone in the house, he was reading through the book and came to a passage that mentioned what he and his son had eaten during a particular day's cycling in Turkey. At a certain point he was disturbed by his Jack Russell Terrier, Jim, who became very excited and attentive all of a sudden. Having overcome his initial annoyance at being disturbed from his work, Mark began to notice what it was that was captivating his dog. The mere mention of the word "biscuits" or "pies" sent Jim wild. The dog would not leave the room and from then on sat in anticipation every time anyone picked up the book.

Busy with his travel book, Mark registered the phenomenon mentally and told his wife about it later, but it was not until early 2013 that he found the time to begin more thorough investigation. The dogs of various friends and acquaintances were drafted in to listen to the first experimental stories. The results were surprising even with those early prototype canine tales. Mark and his friends were surprised to find a great deal of common trigger words that most dogs (dogs in English speaking households) responded to. A list was made and these words were then written into the stories. Eventually after hours of amusing experimentation, the stories were honed to a point that they had the power to captivate most dogs.

Secondary Benefits
What came as a surprise, was the fact that the stories had such a powerful effect upon the humans. Obviously the dogs could not read the stories themselves. It required owners, families and friends to read the stories to the dogs. Owners were enthralled by the stories being written from a dog's perspective and they showed themselves to be especially keen to participate. They loved the dogs' sense of humour. Most encouraging has been the reports of children and teenagers who had been reluctant readers, being transformed by a desire to read to the family dog. Of equal importance, however, must be the reports that badly behaved dogs and those suffering from boredom and depression (yes of course), became much happier and developed better relationships with their owners. This is hardly so surprising is it?

CONTENTS
Stories To Tell Your Dog is an illustrated book of 18 short stories. The stories are suitable for dogs and humans of all ages. Here are a few examples:

His Master's Voice
Tyler the Staffordshire Bull Terrier loves to sing. A family argument over when he first learned to do so is solved when Tyler steps in to clear up the dispute.

Dog Corner
A group of characterful stray dogs are a neighbourhood attraction until something tempts them away. A posse is sent out to find them and tempt them back.

Flash
A Whippet amuses himself each day chasing seagulls at the beach. After he disappears, the gulls terrorise the tourists. Desperate, the local Council pay the owner to let him return on official duty.

A Short Walk In The Park
Bored and lacking exercise, Nero the Doberman escapes from home. The adventure ends with surprising consequences and reassurance about human compassion.

Sausages
Boris the overweight Bulldog is obsessed with sausages. He will risk life and limb to steal them if necessary. On one particular raid his passion leads him further afield than anyone expects.

A Racing Certainty
Scrivener is a deaf mute with an ability to communicate with animals. When he gets a job at a greyhound stables he uses this ability to his advantage. Fortune, however, has a sting in the tail.

Stories To Tell Your Dog is available as a paperback from Amazon or Createspace, and as an e-book from:

Amazon UK
Amazon.com (or by entering the title and author into your local Amazon website)
Smashwords (all formats)
N.B. You do not need an e-reader. You can download a Kindle App for your computer or download the book from Smashwords as a PDF or plain text file.

Other books by the same author are available on these sites and the bestselling paperback book Long Road Hard Lessons is available from Waterstones Bookshops in the UK.